I consider myself a selectively social person. I thoroughly enjoy being on my own and don't often find myself saying "I wish I was out with (insert name here)". Don't get me wrong, I like going out to social events and behaving unleashed, but if I'm with certain people for an extended period of time, I find I can't be bothered and end up preferring to be left to my own devices.
The worlds I encounter in books or shows or movies are often more to my liking than anything reality has in store for me. If I want to just pick up and leave, I don't have to worry about money, travel arrangements, destinations. Characters always find someone who is willing to help. That doesn't happen in real life.
At the moment, I'm living at my parent's house. Not ideal. My mother is an extremely social person and does not like doing things by herself. This then gets thrown upon other people because since she doesn't like to be alone, she thinks others also want the company. Today, for example, I thought it'd be polite to inform her that I was going on a walk around the neighborhood. This simple act ended up putting a damper on the rest of my afternoon.
Mother decided she too would like to go for a walk and asked if I would like her to join. Since I'm such a cheerful person I responded with "Not particularly, but if you want to". Any other person would have taken this moment to bow out, but not mother. Then she complains that I walk too fast. Then she doesn't want to go on the route I normally take because it's too much for her which is fine so we go the other way. We don't even get to the end of the road and she strikes up a conversation with Bill.
I've never seen Bill before, I've never spoken to Bill. Meeting Bill has in no way bettered my life.
Thirty minutes later, the conversation ends and by this point I have made little effort to involve myself with what they were talking about. My only contribution was to tell Bill that I hate people and that don't value much of what they say because it's usually nonsense. Mother finally took the hint that I didn't want to be there. After standing for a half hour awkwardly playing Uno on my phone, I suggested we just go back home.
A waste of a nice walk.
If I don't want to talk to someone, I won't talk to them. This isn't me trying to be rude or anti-social, this is just my personality. If I had met Bill in another circumstance I would have probably been more polite or outgoing. Or if they had a topic of conversation that I had any knowledge about.
I'm much more relaxed in online interactions
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